Ode to a College App

Oh college apps,
How you’ve forsaken me.
You give me the hope of a brighter future yet strip me of my sanity.
My stress is incalculable, and I never get to sleep.
You demand letters of rec
and all of my money
 
I’m left to regret all the APs I didn’t take,
my GPA and its weight,
and why I took the SAT so late.
Why I didn’t take IB Pre-K
or the Finnish fluency exam.
Would those make me appealing?
Will that be enough?
 
So many essays- too many to count,
by the time it’s over, I’m burnt out.
They’re getting worse as I go,
as I repeat the same five answers to twenty questions.
 
And don’t get me started on scholarships-
How do I find one that isn’t a drawing?
SallyMae, Fastweb, Niche, CollegeXpress
all offer ones I’m not likely to get.
 
I’m sorry, college apps, but I really do hate you.
You expect me to decide what to do for the rest of my life
when I can’t even vote.
 
You’ve reduced everything I am and have done
to a couple of numbers
to be accepted or shunned.